and now, some positive, uplifting schtuff…

7 02 2010

 I got on a cleaning kick this evening and went through all my photos. Not enough can be said about digital cameras. Hoooo boy, I should offer to sell people photos that I took of them-and some are good blackmail photos! ;) Seriously though, the expense of this boggles my mind. And some of these photos should have never been printed! Needless to say, I love the economical aspect of digital cameras.

 However, my little film Rebel is a great camera, and here are two photos from it that I personally like:

 This photo was taken in my front yard, before my association decided to trim the trees so that they wouldn’t fall on cars, etc. It was overgrown, yet I loved it. Now they actually look well manicured. The nerve of my association! ;)

   There was once a cool doll museum near me that was going to close down, therefore, I visited it. I tried to get a perspective shot here. Did I succeed?

 And now, time to organize my photos to get rid of some of them………


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Categories : Photography

And the answer is….

7 02 2010

 I got it.

 I got some answers.

 And it took forever and a day to get.

 I had gotten the basic testing for ADD nine years ago-IQ, learning disabilities, processing. I needed to supplement this with a computerized test though, TOVA, to make it a firm diagnosis. Life got in the way though and I never did it.

 Until now. I took both tests and voila.

 Yep, I have a firm diagnosis.

 It shouldn’t shock me any. I have always thought that the tests administered by the psychologist back in 2001 were accurate and there was no need to go further. After all, this center that did the testing is associated with a university that is known for being one of the best schools for training psychologists in the state. (Disclaimer though, they suggested I get the TOVA test also.) If they thought I was ADD, then so be it. Plus, I didn’t want to spend more money than I needed to.

 And I have news for all of you, unless you get this testing done through a public school, it does cost. (However, I was impressed that the TOVA wasn’t that much.)

 It’s amazing to finally be able to say, “HAH! I’m not lazy. I’m not too much of a cuckoobird, and I’m not stupid!” I can’t even begin to tell you how often I’ve felt those things and how often I’ve heard those things through the years.

 For example, when I was in college I went to one of the psychologists that they had on campus because I was having “issues.”  A friend of mine had seen him and had raved about how good this guy was. I made an appointment and lo and behold, he tells me that I’m just lazy and needed to not be in school anymore because obviously I didn’t want to be there since I struggled to stay afloat with my studying.

 Needless to say, I did not go back to see him again and finished college. Barely. 

 When I next saw a psychologist in private practice a short time later, she was a little bit better and said nope, you are definitely not lazy, you are depressed. And of course she was horrified in a professional manner that a psychologist would encourage a woman to drop out of college. I knew it wasn’t the answer though.

 And the next therapist thought ADD, but the testing never happened.

 And finally I got sick of him and I went to that center associated with the school known for being one of the best in the state for training psychologists. I got a hard-nosed, Christian, foreign woman who said that’s it after she was certain that it wasn’t simply depression. You are getting tested. No more of this being without answers.

 And whaddya know???

 I did go back to her recently when I had a work issue, and we finished the testing with the TOVA test. It is given in two parts. The first being before medication is administered, and I scored off-the-charts ADD high. Now that I’m starting meds, it has gone down slightly but is still pretty darned high.

 Soooo, it looks like the doctor she referred me to and I are going to have fun with the medication. The doctor did say that the TOVA isn’t always accurate if there are other issues going on that relate to impulsivity and ADD-like issues. And I respect that. If I have something else besides ADD, I’ll have to deal with it.

 ADD just makes sense though. If you were to meet my father, you’d see that I take after him. The man is brilliant, and he had brillant parents. My paternal grandfather apparently could figure out Calculus problems in his head, but he was a high school dropout. My father (who is not a high school dropout) can not stay organized to save his life, and it drives my mother crazy. More often than not, I hear her scream at him, “You are so ADD!!!”

 Yep, that’s my daddy! And I love him.

 And I obviously take after him…..

 I know that it’s going to be an interesting road to get on the right track again. Right now the psychologist and I are discussing making a schedule to stay on track (because I would like to finish a certificate program in Web Design), and I’ve thought of a few other things that I will show her next week.

 So, I guess it’s a good thing that I’ve not been married before now or had children. Good grief! I personally think me being married prior to this would have been a disaster. And children? If I can’t stay organized, heaven help me if I have another person to be responsible for! I do want both of those things though, and will work hard to be able to have them.

 And so, all I can say is ONWARD!


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Categories : ADD, organizational challenges, psychology

what IS reform and what isn’t-health care, the debate

1 02 2010

 I got to thinking about this subject last week with the elections in Massachusetts, and of course when I wrote the check out to pay for my health insurance COBRA.

 As I am not a permanent employee yet at my job, I have to keep my COBRA coverage until I get hired on there-or somewhere else-permanently. I grit my teeth once a month when I write this check.

 Five-hundred and seven dollars. Yep. 

Stupid me for keeping my nice PPO coverage when I got laid off from my last job. Great coverage. Not-so-great prices.

 ”Get an individual insurance policy then,” you say.

 I am unable to get an individual policy due to minor conditions I have been treated for in the past-and are currently being treated for. Mind you that I have never been hospitalized for this nor is this severe, but I have been turned down once for an individual policy due to this. When I inquired recently about this and asked why this condition, that I repeat, have never, ever been hospitalized for, disqualifies me for individual coverage, the insurance broker (who handles my homeowners coverage, I should add) said, “Because they’re afraid they will be paying for your hospitalization.”

 HUH?

 How many times do I need to repeat myself? I have not been hospitalized for this, nor will I ever be!

 And so, I would like to ask all of you this question. What does health care reform mean to you? I know that to my neighbor who had thyroid cancer and needs to take synthetic thyroid for the rest of her life, it means not having to order her drugs through Canada in order to not pay a fortune for this medication.

 To me, it means having the insurance company realize that I have lost 90 pounds and am healthy, yet have one condition that I am being treated for. One minor condition.

 Why should this stop me from obtaining an individual health insurance policy?

 In reality, it shouldn’t. I remember when my work thought about changing to individual policies. Half of the people went on this policy. I got denied, but another woman-a smoker with high blood pressure, I might add, got approved without any problems!

 I don’t smoke, I don’t drink and my blood pressure is low.

 What is the logic in this?

 CNN had a commentator on after the Massachusetts elections who said that Congress and the Senate should have focused on something like doing away with pre-existing conditions, something that everyone can agree on.

 Amen to that!

 Granted, I was kind of scared with the recent health care reform debates. A giant overhaul of health care ran by the government sounds horrible-and a recipe for disaster. Quality of care will suffer when we have a system like that.

 However, I think that insurance companies that deny people individual policies based on reasons such as mine are practicing blatant discrimination and need to be stopped. Plain and simple.

 And I’ll be gritting my teeth when I stick the check in the mailbox……


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Categories : Personal

No matter what their age, to some, parents=money

24 01 2010

 The bank of Mom and Dad is a phrase often used to describe lazy kids hitting their parents up for cash all too frequently to go out with friends to the mall, etc.

 Kid stuff.

 To some though, the bank of mom and dad keeps on rolling, no matter what their age.

 For not-so-much kid stuff.

 Unfortunately, this is a subject near and dear to my heart, and after reading this article, I realize  it’s a subject near and dear to others hearts also…..

 I was unemployed for almost a year and when this happens, you realize that your money tree gets a little thin after awhile. I had savings though.

 News flash: savings goes down fast.

 And so, what did I do for extra $ besides subsist on unemployment?

  • I EBayed. (I’m pretty good at it, too.)
  • I recycled once a month. (Note to all: the machines where you feed in the bottles and cans pays the most…..)
  • I sold my handmade cards and Christmas gift tags. (I’m pretty good at that also.)
  • I was a dog and cat sitter. (Forgot to give a dog water once. Woops! Notsogood at this! ;) )
  • Airport shuttle service. (I know LAX!)
  • Doctor visit shuttle service.
  • I’m sure there’s something else I did, but I’m forgetting at the moment.

All these things helped, but along with my unemployment check, it wasn’t enough a couple times.

 I had to hit the folks up.

 Like a woman in the article said, it’s embarrassing.

 I mean, I was the model daughter of responsibility to them. I bought a car previously and paid it off no problem. I own a home for goodness sakes. I have excellent credit.

 And here I am, hitting my parents up for $$ a couple times when unemployed. (Like I said, savings goes down fast.)  And what did they do?

 At first, they laughed. Hard.

 And then they realized that I truly did need the help.

 And so, they did.

 Was it right to do? Could I have learned better financial management skills to cope better in times like this? Is it bad that I even had that option?

 Yes and no. Yes and no. Yes and no.

 I didn’t feel good about it, that’s for sure. Here I am, a college graduate, a full-fledged adult, hitting my parents up for $$ when chances are I could have learned better money management skills to cope during these unprecedented economic times.

 And the reality is, these are unprecedented economic times. At least in my lifetime.

 And the reality also is, I did it.

 Not unlike many others out there, I guess.

 Not unlike 40 percent of all adults today who get financial help from their parents, according to this article….

 I could use this article as a rallying cry against unjust taxes that make the cost of living in this state unbearable. I could blame a number of things for this somewhat irresponsible turn of events in my life. Things outside my control.

 But the fact of the matter is, my situation, along with a number of other people’s, was a reality.

 And I am grateful to my parents. So grateful.

 Unemployment did teach me where I went wrong spending my money when I had enough of it. God also taught me many lessons during this time period. That sometimes, life’s a bitch and we have to depend on things outside ourselves.  I have also learned that frugality is a wonderful thing. I have learned from these mistakes and would not like to repeat them again now that I have been consistently employed these past four months.

 At Christmas last month when my parents and I were opening gifts, I thanked my parents for their help this past year and told them that I was going to not do that again.

 And then my dad let me know that the bank of mom and dad accepts checks and cash for re-payment……….

 Help isn’t free! :)


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Categories : Personal, unemployment

Facebook…the good, the bad, the addiction :)

17 01 2010

  

 When the internet came around ten-plus years ago, I certainly never thought that it would consume so much of my time-or my life.

 And then, I met Facebook a little over a year ago…..

 I find it hard to believe that a site such as this, which was invented by a kid in his dorm room at Harvard five plus years ago, would have grabbed me in hook, line and sinker. I never really got that into Myspace. This though. This has got me.

 Who wouldn’t be hooked with Facebook? With it’s Facebook pages, online games and chat capabilities, it’s a gold mine for people like me-the median age group that uses this site. My gosh! I could be online all night long talking to people!

 Haven’t done that-yet-even though I have spent waaaay too much time on there.

 Why, you ask?

 The world is on here! My world, that is.

 The neighbors who threw the bad-assed parties as teenagers (when I was a kid, sadly enough…) are on here, a family friend who used to babysit me is on here. My first date, who is now married and a father, is on here. My kindergarten best friend is on here also.

 In fact, roughly one-third of my friend list is people that I went to school with-whether it be kindergarten, high school or college. I’m even Facebook friends with people I know through their blogs. Church friends take up roughly 17 percent of my friends list and family comes in a not-so-distant third with eight percent of my friends list.

 It has been fun, and surprising, to reconnect with people that I see on Facebook. It has also provided some interesting, and sombering experiences though also. The sombering would be finding out a friend from college passed away when his niece wrote a note on his Facebook page.

 The interesting, or I should say, really awesome, experiences include getting to know family members who I only see at family get-togethers every decade or so. I wonder how many more family members are on Facebook that I don’t know about? Probably all of them. :)

 I would say that overall, Facebook has been an incredibly positive experience. The world can feel incredibly small sometimes when you connect with people.

 Whether it be chatting.

 Playing a game of poker.

 Or ratting out your 12-year-old cousin (who shouldn’t be on Facebook in the first place) who is posting pictures of her house with her address showing for all the world to see.

 And so, here’s to Facebooking.

 As long as it remains free.


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