
Please excuse the pity party post from the other day. I was having a horrendous flashback of stupid childhood traumatic memories fond remembrance of days that have shaped my life and made my family the happy, perfect clan that we are.
Granted, I’m not saying that I have this horrendously arrogant family. Not in the slightest. Are we human? Yes. Could we all be perfect like me? Why yes.
And I also realize that even though I am blessed with the family that I have, I realize that I have choices as an adult as to how I spend my time with them. Yes, as a Christian I need to honor my parents. I do honor them, and I continue to. I respect my family.
And I have to give up illusions that I have of having relationships with other family members who don’t care about me. And that, my dear blog readers, hurts. It hurts like hell.
I suppose it came on strong yesterday for many reasons. One being that it was a holiday. Aren’t holidays supposed to be happyhappyjoyjoy for all family members to come together and love each other?? (Note the facetious, smart-assed tone…)
It was also a quiet holiday yesterday. I spent it at my parents’ house. Just me, them and the dog. Bless my mom, she made a healthy dinner. No stuffing (Don’t think my dad didn’t comment on that one…lol), just turkey, gravy, veggies cooked in chicken broth (very good stuff!), baked yams and a dessert she made. It was very good! However, I miss the people around.
And that, my folks, is where the power of choice comes to play.
I had the choice to spend at least some of Thanksgiving with another portion of my family. And I realize now that I should have. I could have had dinner with my parents and gone over to the other family shin dig for a bit. Did I? For many reasons, no. However, I should have not worried about those other reasons. I’ve done that for too damn long.
And sometimes I need to realize that friends make family very often. The picture above is of me being silly with my dear friend Robyn this evening. I smile now thinking about the Christmases she invited me over when I just could not bear being around certain family members. A tear comes to my eye also because it meant a lot to know that someone other than family opened up their home to me to come and celebrate a great season. Friends can very often be like family. Praise God for that!
And so, I am blessed. I have choices though as to how I spend family time.
May I wisely remember that this coming month….
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